February 2010
30 posts
Please Fire Me.: Please fire me. I work for an... →
Please fire me. I work for an extended warranty company with a bunch of adult potheads. They go to the garage of our complex to smoke throughout the day. They flick their cigarettes, still burning, into their ashtray. This sometimes lights it on fire. They don’t know how to tell time so are late…
“I took a deep breath and listened to the old bray of my heart: I am, I am, I am.”
– Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar (via somethingintellectual)
On Being a Psychopath
I spent a large portion of the day I called in “sick” trying to discover whether or not I may be a psychopath. It’s not as easy as it sounds; trust me. I’ve always been able to create and dismiss my emotions fairly easily, something behavioral scientists would describe as “emotional intelligence.” I’ve always thought of it as acting, but I assumed that...
The Notorious B.I.G. | Big Poppa
“I’m afraid that if you look at a thing long enough, it loses all of its meaning.”
– Andy Warhol
Bathroom Stalls
One of the more uncomfortable moments involving work happens in the bathroom. A room normally reserved for quiet self-reflection and the oddly pleasurable sensation that comes with vacating one’s bowels.
So there I was, peeing at the sole urinal in the restroom when one of my bosses literally stumbles in. The door careens open as if smashed with a battering ram and slams against the back...
You CAN die from boredom. →
Great.
Wal-Mart Dubbed 'Worst Person in the World' on... →
Wow Wal-Mart. Wow. I mean, I am sub-human and all selfish, but even this is low. Suing a brain-dead woman for all she has because you voluntarily paid her hospital bills is fuckin’ low.
Hummingbird Nest →
Live cam of a Hummingbird’s nest. Prettttttttty awesome.
“Happiness is a state of mind and, like all things, it takes practice. Devote...”
– Love Happens (via kari-shma)
Fuck Yo' Earth Nigga!
Green-this, green-that. Shut the fuck up already - I’m all about living an anti-earth, pro-human lifestyle. Other animals are only sacred insofar as how delicious they taste paired with asparagus and carrots. When we kill enough of the lower species we may have to move on to eating human meat, I am not above this. Chances are, I will be dead by the time any of this inevitable cannibalism...
On the pains of being a bad American.
For me, one of the more depressing moments of my (too-long? too-short?) day is realizing that I have an abundance of money in the bank, and nothing to spend it on.
WatchI can’t fucking wait for Fallout: New Vegas. I have been playing the Fallout series of games since the beginning. I remember opening my copy of PC Gaming World back in 1996 (holy shit, 14 years ago) and seeing the ads for the original post-nuclear role-playing game. Back when they still came with CDs containing the newest demos for games to be released that year, and lucky me, Fallout was on...
Corporation Says It Will Run for Congress -... →
How long before this joke becomes a sad part of reality? 15 years I say.
“I love people who make me laugh. I honestly think it’s the thing I like most, to...”
– Audrey Hepburn (via kari-shma)
Barefoot running: How humans ran comfortably and... →
Interesting, perhaps I should ditch my “new balance”? Get it? Because “NEW BALANCE” is necessary for running with shoes one versus without them. Geez I’m hilarious.
Goa Rape Someone Else! →
Apparently the tourism officials in India blame the rape of a 9-year-old Russian girl on the bikini she was wearing….wow.
North Korean Propaganda Posters Show the US...
Deeeeyammmmn, those North Koreans sure know how to make some propaganda. The posters, artfully updated, still employ the same muted color schemes from the 1940s, perhaps they seek to borrow credibility reserved for our fond memories of WWII propaganda. As cognitive science tells us, something known is something true. Take this little ditty for example:
The text, when translated, reads: “Do...
Kulula-air tries not to take itself too seriously... →
